Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Randomize
