i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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