It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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