you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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