What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
