glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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