You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
