my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize