I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
