She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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