I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize
