Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize