Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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