He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize