I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize