i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
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