Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
