I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
