what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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