In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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