Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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