you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
