I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize