therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
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The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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