Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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