I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
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you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
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Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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