you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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