Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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