i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize