So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore