Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
