Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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