It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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