I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
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