He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Acid is not a monday night drug
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
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Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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