3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
