I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
