I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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