very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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