Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
