Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize