Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sarcasm needs its own font
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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