And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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