Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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