How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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