I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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