Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize