I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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