...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
