So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
