If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Michael Bay diarrhea
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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